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another person's blog i enjoy reading is dallas' blog at: http://titanically.blogspot.com his entry on relationships (24th April 07) reminded me of wad happened last year between jes, munz and i... to some extend i agree wif him... but then to hold onto such belief is child-like... statements like 'my daddy will beat ur daddy'... coz u have faith and trust in ur dad being the best dad in the world... but tt may not be the case and it takes child-like faith to trust tt... similiarly... his ideas and thoughts are true to some degree... but it takes child-like faith to really believe tt all u need to do is to understand the other party for a relationship to really work out... and if it doesn't it is due to the fact that pple dun wanna understand each other and thus fault falls onto human faith and trust... understanding plays a big part... to understand each other and to understand why we do wad we do and think wad we think... but understanding is not really the key... the key is acceptance... accepting wad u understand and wad u dun understand... i can understand why u do things that way but i dun accept it... it is useless... but if i can accept the way u do things even though i dun understand it... that is how relationship work out... and for this to happen... it goes beyond faith and trust... it goes straight to the heart... love... do u love(now... if u r wondering... love is not the bgr/bbr/ggr kinda love but universal love) tt person? if u do... u would have faith in him... u would trust him... u would accept him... and u would try to understand him... like a mother... who wakes up in the middle of the night to feed the baby... she might not understand at tt pt of time why the baby has to wake up then to drink milk... but she accepts tt and feeds the baby... if we keep to the faith and trust level without the love behind it... things wun last... things wun go far... coz when trust is broken and faith failed... the whole relationship collapsed... easy to rebuild yes... but well it ain't deep... but if u have love involved in it... it wun collapse that easily... but when failed... it is not that easy to rebuild... like the episode between me and the above mentioned two... munz friendship was a friendship i invested in with love... love for a fren, juz like the one i built wif douglas... when things go wrong... i may not understand it and may bitch abt it... but i learnt to accept it... and even though time and again u repeated the mistake... i never questioned ur integrity and never bring it up during arguments... simply becoz i accepted it... but after the entire incident, our friendship was shaken and affected and had failed... pple ask me if it is possible to be like before... my answer is no... coz after all that had happened... i failed u... but u failed me too... and the cup, now broken, no matter how well it is mend... will always carry the cracks from the fall... it hurts a lot... even till tis day... and it is becoz of the hurt, the investment and the love i put in tt is making me hold back... coz i know... things will never be the same... i rather things be as it is now... then we try to go back to before and i end up being a real hypocrite... pretending that nothing has happened... but deep within me... the scar is there... jes was a good fren but alas... it is just one of faith and trust... and once the trust is broken... the whole thing collapsed... it may be easier to build up the frenship again... but i guess... the hesitation from munz will affect how i will go about rebuilding it... and well... rather things be as it is now then me being a hypocrite... since this whole incident started wif the idea of hypocrite... and thinking abt this episode made me ponder abt how my standing wif others are affect by this incident... he might deny it... but from wad he says and do... it is pretty obvious who's side he is on... and since i've decided that i m not going to rebuild the relationship wif jes, he can keep to his end of the bargain... but i only have tis to say to u... take a step out of urself and look... u will see things u may not notice before... i still value u as a fren... i may not be there for u always like ur other frenz... but i'll always be here for u... if u ever need someone... i'm here... if u trust me... if u have faith in me... then try understanding me... why i've decided to take tis step... it is not as easy as u think... and if u still see me as a fren... then all i ask of u... is to think of me sometimes... she might always be closer to the other 2... but i do hope she still regards me as a fren... i have not sent u my birthday wishes and greetings yet... not becoz i dun wan to... but becoz work has been pretty consuming during that period of time... and it had slipped my mind... glad tt u enjoyed urself in s'pore during ur birthday... and now tt u r legally an adult... i do wish tt u will enjoy ur life which u now steer on ur own, free of ur parents control (legally at least) and promise me u will be happy ok? happy belated birthday... sometimes i wonder... how do everyone think of me... to succeed in life is to bring a smile to the faces of the people who think of you... have i succeeded? or have i failed? 飛輪海 - 一個人流浪 In Solitude at 2:11 am 0 shared in solitude | ||||||||||||